Suicide is NO JOKE

SUICIDE IS NO JOKE.

Our history, collectively, with mental illness is not good. We've forever made it the butt of jokes, quickly labeled those struggling as "crazy," and made light of a deeply serious issue plaguing our species.

My own history has not been good. I've learned that mental illness runs in my mother's line. Her Larson grandfather committed suicide by handgun. She and her brothers struggled/struggle, mostly undiagnosed with some form of anxiety and depression. I see it in me and my siblings.

But even in my own life, in my own family, "crazy people" have been the butt of jokes, not the source of introspection and acknowledgement. And that lack of taking it serious, hasn't served us well. ANY of us!

December 10, 2000, is a day of infamy in my personal timeline.

I left work that day so desperate to escape my reality that I drove to the woods and attempted to end my life by asphyxiation/carbon monoxide poisoning. I saw a Ford Ranger XLT the other day, about the same year as the truck I drove into the woods that day. It triggered an immediate flashback.

Tomorrow marks 22 years.

I'm much older and wiser today. I have two gorgeous, intelligent daughters who've now attained adulthood. They've brought unquantifiable joy and meaning to my life. I adopted the oldest a year, almost to the day, after my suicide attempt. How my life drastically changed in that one trip around the sun!!!

That doesn't mean I don't struggle. It's been a slow process of healing, of rebuilding my confidence in who I am and learning to love myself. I'm not done.

There is a new number to dial if you're in crisis.

988

Suicide and depression are no laughing matters. You're not crazy. There are people in this world who understand and truly care.

I'm one of those people.