A Drummers Dilemna

Some of you may not know that "in another life" I worked as a radio personality and semi-professional drummer. The short-lived smooth jazz station in Tallahassee was where I called home for the last semester of school back in '97 and for several months after graduation. Money was the main reason I left that job for greener pastures. But throughout my whole adult life, I've found ways to pursue my passion for drumming. Opportunities have dwindled since leaving the church music scene back in Tally, but the passion is still there.

Any time I am in a concert setting, at a music store or around other musicians, I get the urge to pick up a pair of sticks and bang on something. That was the case this past Thursday.

Indy's smooth jazz station, WYJZ, was hosting a listener appreciation party at a small music venue, featuring saxophonist Walter Beasley. He brought his whole band and for 90 minutes they rocked the Music Mill. Paying close attention to the drummer, I thought (as I often do), "I could be doing that!"

And it's true. While not the most technically-precise or fine-tuned musician, I do pretty well to hold my own with most contemporary forms of music. A self-taught drummer, I really prefer to play smooth jazz, R&B and gospel for their rhythm-centric groove and syncopation.

And its not just the magic of music or the thrill of performance that calls out to me in the shadows of the club, church or music hall. It is the whole atmosphere and the connectedness that joins musician and audience member. It is the power of creation at work, drawing people in on an emotional and physical level.

Even when I handled events for the radio station in days gone by, I sensed that I was part of the larger music scene. I was able to go out and enjoy good music while feeling a part of some larger community not bound by race, socio-economic status or religion. I miss that.

Thursday's concert was just another reminder of what I am missing. And while I've tried to fill that void with the occasional church appearance as guest drummer on a worship team, I yearn for more than just a four-song set on a Sunday morning.

I think it is important to seek creative outlets and to explore the things you are most passionate about. Sometimes life can get in the way of that pursuit, but it helps to be reminded that you make time for the things of most import to you. If you are passionate about something, if you have a creative spark inside you, why aren't you passionate in your pursuit of it? I find myself asking that question more and more.

It's Freakin' Cold Here!

You might think that a kid who spent the first 17 years of his life here would know this already...but IT'S FREAKIN' COLD UP HERE!!!

After a week of 70-degree-plus temperatures and one of the mildest Marches on record, this Hoosier kid is stunned by the chill in the air (see temperature map above, courtesy of The Weather Channel). I mean, I remember that there is usually another cold spell around Easter before Springtime weather firmly takes hold in the Heartland, but freezing temps and snow flurries??? SHEESH! C'mon, Mama Nature! How 'bout a little help here?!?!?!

I recently moved my family up from Tallahassee, Florida. I thought we had survived winter, what with a late February blizzard and all, then the sudden 80-degree, record setting days that followed. But this weather is PSYCHOTIC! Call Doctor Phil or something!!!

We used to joke in Tallahassee that if you didn't like the weather, just wait 10 minutes. The speed with which change could occur in the stratosphere above North Florida was amazing, but seldom did we get 40-degree swings in a 12-hour period, only to have it swing 40 degrees the other way soon after. That's what it's been doing here in Indiana.

It begs the question, "What was I thinking?" And I could live with this psycho weather if I knew an end was in sight, but a co-worker just told me in passing that he's seen snow flurries as late as May before. That is very disconcerting.

This is my formal plea to Mr. Jack Frost. Get the heck out of Central Indiana and go back to the poles where you belong!

Long Winter of the Soul

It's 3 AM on a cold Indiana morning, though not as cold as it has been for two and a half months. Could we be seeing the last frigid days of winter? The groundhog thinks so. I certainly hope so.

It was just three short months ago that I loaded up the family truckster and headed to good ol' Indy…in the dead of winter. As I sit here by the fire and the light of my monitor, wondering what the hell I'm doing up at this hour, I reflect on the icy days of December, January and February. And while it seems that we are finally emerging from the cold, dark past, I'm left to wonder, has my marriage survived the winter?

Sure, we enjoyed the change in climate, the adventure of new beginnings and snow days, but as reality sets in—new jobs, new mortgage, new school—that whole "let's start over in Indiana" idea seems a little more suspect.

Honestly, it has been an adventure. The girls seem to be adjusting well. The job is certainly paying well. We love our new family at The Dwelling Place. And we love being close to my family. But we certainly haven't escaped us…Tracy and I, that is.

We had hoped for a rebirth, of sorts, for our marriage…a fresh start…a DO-OVER. Hasn't quite been as easy as calling "Ghost man on third!"

I knew that the transition would take its toll eventually. I knew that rebuilding trust could take forever. I just expected the new environs to help us cling to our newfound selves. But for whatever reasons—and I'm sure there is a plethora—we butterflies are clinging to the old cocoon. Why haven't we broken free and begun to fly? We're in counseling. We have a great support network. We seem to still like each other (I said LIIIKE, DOTTIE!) and enjoy each other's company. But to say that the flicker of romance is about as dim as my desktop lamp on low would be an understatement.

I'm finding out that marital do-overs are much harder than the ones invoked during child's play. Would the damn ghost man just score already!!! SHEESH! Steal home or something!

Our marriage still seems to be struggling through this winter period. If you read this and think "Aw, not Tris and Cracy," then you haven't been following along with the program. Say a prayer for us. Drop us a line or a note to say you're thinking of us.

We're both committed to making this thing work. We're just not sure we have the right tools. And let's face it, those of you who know me know I ain't the master craftsman when tools of any kind are required to fix a broken thing.

Well, that's all for today, children. Indiana's winter was bearable, but this long winter of the soul is getting old.

How Things Are Supposed To Be

I used to think that Christians thought they had the market cornered on truth. And while that is still a major sticking point for me, I’ve encountered even more Christians who believe they know how things ought to be. Whether it’s a dyed-in-the-wool evangelical who believes colonial America was the utopia we should return to or the modern-day Nostradamus who knows what the future holds and wants to shape it with cookie-cutter precision, Christians want the world to know how things are supposed to be.

For instance, God never intended same-sex unions, planned parenthood, equal rights or stem cell research, so we should ignore the progresses of modern science, women, gay people and minorities. We should continue to step on the backs of the marginalized so that we—and I mean WASP-y middle class Americans—can attain our goals of 2.5 children, 2 cars, two thousand-plus square feet of living space and a dog we can kick when it seems that life is unfair and the world around us is going to hell in a handbasket.

What really irks me about many Christians is that they are often quick to offer the quick-fix formula of prayer, bible reading and quiet time, yet they usually can’t show results to prove its effectiveness. That formula written on a chalkboard would look something like this:


p+br+qt=by

The end result is a better you.

Formulas are nice if you’re an MIT student, but if you’re just a regular Joe struggling to get along in the world, they mean diddly-poo...the latter flung on a chalkboard ain't pretty. Besides, every religion in the world will tell you that some sort of quiet time including meditation or reflective prayer will give you inner peace. The problem results when inner peace doesn’t translate into a better you. If you step out of your “prayer closet” and cuss the first person or inanimate object that does you wrong, then your peace was way too fleeting. If you aren’t charitable, merciful, loving, compassionate and kind, then who cares how many Bible verses you can quote, how many days you can fast and pray or what you have to say about the state of society???

I’d like just a few more Christians to spend more time on introspection. Stay in that prayer closet just an hour longer and take a mirror in there with you! Get things in your own life straight before you tell everyone else how things should be. Jesus did say something about the log in your own eye.

I'm not sure how the world is supposed to be according to God's grand design, but the Bible does give me a pretty good picture of how Jesus was, how he lived and what kind of character he displayed. All I'm saying is that Christians should start to reflect Him and quit worrying about everyone and everything else. I'm just sayin'.

Miami, Here We Come!

THE COLTS ARE GOING TO THE SUPERBOWL!!!!

To say that I'm excited is an understatement. As a Colts fan for the last 24 years, I am beside myself with anticipation of the Indianapolis NFL franchise's first Vince Lombardi trophy.

It seems fitting that the Colts will face my childhood favorite Chicago Bears. Truth be told, I still rooted for the Bears through the mid-80's--yes, even the SuperBowl Shuffle team--while getting acclimated to my new team. But even through the Mike Pagel and Jeff George years, I faithfully supported the Indianapolis Colts and now this.

I cannot say enough about Tony Dungy, Peyton Manning and the entire Colts organization. They have proudly represented all that's right and good about my hometown. I was a proud Dungy supporter when he and I called Florida home because his Tampa Bay Bucs were always drafting players out of my alma mater, Florida State. When news broke of his move to Indy, I was elated. I knew that it was just a matter of time before he built a championship caliber team here, like he did in Tampa just a few years ago.

So bring on the Bears and the Miami Beach humidity!!! This is the year of the horse, no doubt about it!

GO COLTS!!!

Coach Knight's Untarnished Legacy

Photo: Sports Illustrated/CNN


Is it just me or do most, if not all, sports writers have an axe to grind with The General? Can we not just recognize his accomplishment for what it is and say "Congratulations Coach!"???

After reading one columnist in the local paper and two more columns on ESPN.com, I am getting a little irritated with the asterisks they want to place beside the winningest coach's record. Is it really that important where the record number was reached? I mean, he could be coaching at Central Connecticut State University for all I care. The man is a legend.

If we're going to put an asterisk beside something, how about we put a bold, 48-point font asterisk next to his dismissal by Indiana. In the footnotes, it would explain how Myles Brand was an arrogant boob out to ruin the famed basketball program in Bloomington. Were it not for Brand's larger-than-Mt. Everest ego, Knight might well have finished his career at I.U.

I'm sure all the Knight-bashers, most of whom get paid to write sports columns, would be quick to point to Knight's declining stats as I.U. Head Coach, but I believe the arrogance of the school's administration and their handling of the situation may have been part of the problem there, as well. Have you ever stayed a week, a month or a year too long at a job where the bosses made it known that they didn't personally care for you? Did your performance suffer or your attitude slide as a result?

I am just saying that for all the negative angles you can take to tarnish Knight's image and his accomplishments, the facts and the statistics speak for themselves.

I challenge any sports writer to take a survey of past Knight players--at Army, Indiana and Texas Tech--and see if the overwhelming majority don't have great things to say about their coach...about how he molded them as players, and more importantly as men, or about how he held academics to such a high standard and helped them to degrees/careers...etc.

So you have a problem with his tact or lack thereof...you don't like the way he addresses the media when they ask stupid questions or display a clear bias...you don't like the level of his intensity or how it is displayed courtside...fine! GET OVER IT!

I, like so many other Knight admirers, will cherish this moment in history and each record-increasing victory. Congratulations, Coach Knight!

The Bad Taste of Christianese

Have you ever eaten Chinese food only to have the aftertaste of MSG-saturated, mystery meat linger on your taste buds for hours? I’ll admit, I’m no fan of Asian cuisine, period. It may have more to do with my mom force feeding us Chop Suey out of a can and my suspicion about the ingredients than is truly warranted, but I usually hit a fast food drive-thru when the rest of my family wants Chinese food.

My avoidance of Chinese restaurants was recently bolstered by a bad experience at one. Similar negative experiences at church now have me wondering if I’ll begin avoiding them like the plague, too. Allow me to explain.

(Note: The churches in this story shall remain unnamed.)

I attended a Christmas play performed by the children at my parent’s church just over a week ago. It was your standard fare of “us versus the world,” evangelical mentality, focused more on what’s wrong with the world, and in this case politically-correct municipal government, than it was with the miraculous story of the Savior’s birth.

I was impressed that the pastor did not get up to preach before or after the play. That was pleasing and quite atypical for an Assemblies of God church. The pastor’s wife, however, felt the need to begin preaching after the show because no good AG service can end without a proper altar call. She went on and on about blood sacrifice, covenant relationship, Jesus’ atonement for our sins ad nauseum. I was disappointed. Why ruin a perfectly good performance by the kids at church—my niece as Angel #2 in the Nativity was a Tony-worthy performance—with Christianese? Did the pastor’s wife really think that people would accept the offer of Christ after a kid’s play??? It barely even touched on the Good News of Jesus!

A few days later, I attended a Christmas Eve Service with my parents at their old church. It wasn’t any better. Instead of a reverent Communion Service, we were surprised to find ourselves taking in a musical performed mostly by puppets. That’s right, I said puppets! It was like Jim Henson meets Jimmy Swaggart, only the latter would NEVER have approved of the music.

We heard rip-offs of everything from Jay-Z to Van Halen. When some long-haired puppets on instruments began performing a song called “Santa Claus” to the tune of Van Halen’s “Panama,” I almost got my girls and left the church. I laughed. I cried. It was the worst Christmas Eve Service ever!

At one point, I turned to my wife and my mother and bemoaned how I missed the Catholic Church. And right on cue, the pastor of the church—I’m not sure of their Protestant affiliation—got up and gave an altar call. Do I even need to question the relevance? Not even an on-the-fence heathen would have fallen heavenward from laughing so hard at the sight of a Sammy Hagar look-alike puppet singing “Santa Claus.”

Thanks to recent experiences at church, I now have the bad taste of Christianese in my mouth. It has lingered there now for days. I’ve tried everything from mouthwash to meditation, but cannot remove the foul flavor from my buds.

Truth be told, I’ll eat at 10 Chinese restaurants before I’ll visit either one of those churches again. I hate Christianese that much!

Jesus Was On NBC's Today Show!

Did you see him?

Jesus made a surprise appearance this morning on NBC's Today Show!

In the spirit of the holidays, Today Show producers decided to share a video from NBC's Minneapolis affiliate. It was part of a series called "Land of 10,000 Stories," an obvious play on the Minnesota state motto. The piece by KARE-TV's Boyd Huppert is called Art of Compassion and it painted a living portrait of Jesus. Who knew he lived in Utah?

The article hardly does justice to the video segment aired nationally by Today Show. It literally moved me to tears. Here is a woman, moved by compassion for others and her passion for the arts, who is being the earthly representation of an unearthly kind of Love.

If you read or have read the New Testament accounts of Jesus, then you know that he said to look for him in some unlikely places. Well, NBC found him on a farm in rural Utah, loving complete strangers and bringing healing to their inner wounds. I was humbled by the unlikely appearance.

In everything give thanks...

Today I am thankful for my wife...for her courage, strength, optimism, perseverence and her love.

Our marriage has overcome some mountainous obstacles, not the least of which was a seemingly insurmountable challenge we faced over the last six months. With God's grace, we made it over the summit and are carefully navigating the steep, rocky decent on the other side.

I am thankful that our marriage did not succumb, like so many others, to the perils of infidelity, insecurity, apathy, depression, grief or pride. We fought through as a united front to get to where we are today.

And though our next challenge was self-made, we face it with more courage, excitement and unity than we've ever had in our married life. I am thankful for this next adventurous leg of our journey, and that I have such a willing and competent partner with which to share it. I am doubly thankful for the two blessings we carry on this leg of the journey with us--namely Merikathryn and Makenna. For their sake, as much as ours, I am thankful that God helped us over the summit in September of this year.

Thanksgiving has a whole new meaning this year, like it did in 2001.

Because I have received so bountifully, I want to learn to be a more cheerful and active giver. Generosity has not always come so easy for me, but I am slowly learning. I hope that you, too, have plenty to be thankful for this holiday season. I also hope that you remember the poor and the downtrodden in your community. Don't let this opportunity pass to be a blessing to someone in need. That said, I encourage you with the following:


The Cheerful Giver
-----------------------------
But this I say: He who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work. As it is written (in Psalms 112:9):


He has dispersed abroad,
He has given to the poor;
His righteousness endures forever.

Now may He who supplies seed to the sower, and bread for food, supply and multiply the seed you have sown and increase the fruits of your righteousness, while you are enriched in everything for all liberality, which causes thanksgiving through us to God. (2 Corinthians 9: 6-11, NKJV)


Proverbs on Giving
------------------------------
Whoever gives to the poor will lack nothing,
but those who close their eyes to poverty will be cursed. (Prov. 28:27, NLT)

Blessed are those who are generous,
because they feed the poor. (Prov. 22:9, NLT)

He who oppresses the poor taunts his Maker,
But he who is gracious to the needy honors Him. (Prov. 14:31, NASV)

Those who shut their ears to the cries of the poor
will be ignored in their own time of need. (Prov. 21:13, NLT)

Human Trafficking? C'mon it's Slavery!

Let’s be real and just call a spade a spade, for once. Human trafficking is nothing more than modern-day slavery. The “trafficking” of human life in any era sickens me, whether it is Asian women sold today on the black market as prostitutes or the African male sold years ago as a slave. People are not disposable commodities to be bought and sold or traded for, period.

The fact that this is part of our American heritage saddens me. I hate that I cannot raise my daughters without facing this grotesque reality. Sure, while they are young, I can try to teach them to be colorblind and to treat all people as they would want to be treated, but the sad truth is, we’ll have to cross that bridge one day.

One day, when my daughters are old enough to understand and make rational judgments about such matters, I will have to explain to them what racism is and how it festers like an open wound on the soul of America. When my daughters hear racial slurs at school or one of them is taunted or teased for being 50% African-American, I will have to tell the story of slavery, discrimination and hate that mars our collective, national past.

I hate that.

I want my daughters to believe that all people are created equal like it says in our Declaration of Independence. I never want them to look down on others for reasons of race, religion, gender or nationality. I want them to learn how to love all people no matter how different they are. But in being honest with them, I have to teach them about our history. I have to let them know the events that have shaped our society. I have to let them know about the prejudices that helped to shape our family. Maybe they will learn not only from their parents’ and grandparents’ mistakes, but from the mistakes of our forefathers, as well.

I wish I could teach my girls to be colorblind, but history and society won’t allow it. Maybe their generation will finally put an end to slavery once and for all. And maybe, just maybe, they’ll have the courage to call things as they are, and not hide behind politically correct, yet morally reprehensible terms like “human trafficking.”

Your Florida Home Awaits!

Nestled on the oustkirts of Tallahassee on a canopy road is this 5-year-old, one owner home. It features a spacious 1900 sq.ft., split floor plan with four bedrooms and two full baths. Great location for schools--Canopy Oaks Elementary--and for shopping--two minutes from Oak Valley Publix, CVS and Dollar General and 10 minutes from Tallahassee Mall. Easy access to I-10 from Capital Circle or U.S. 27 (Monroe St).



Nearly half an acre with fenced back yard, room for pets to run and frontage on Old Bainbridge Road. Spacious two-car garage with room for an SUV and a family-sized sedan.

FOR SALE BY OWNER - $245,900

5069 Old Bainbridge Road

Call for appointment:

(850) 878-6893

Tree Hugger Homer

Okay, no one who knows me would ever label me a "tree hugger," a Homer for sure, but not an avid environmentalist. Still, my newfound appreciation for all that God is and all that He's given us, I find it a bit disturbing that societies as advanced as ours cannot deal with rampant pollution, raping of the earth's natural resources, and the like. We really need to get some kind of handle on our consumeristic, addictive tendencies, because right now we don't even have a grasp! But I cannot say it as well--or as humorously--as the writer of this article:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/5237038.stm

Thanks to my friend Roger in the UK for linking me to it!

The Wheeling Covered Bridge, near the farm, was built in 1877...pretty cool piece of history 

This is Cornutopia, btw! 

My great grandfather's farm house...beautiful but in need of repairs 

Francisco, IN...near Princeton (my birthplace) 

My grandparents on mom's side...buried at Fairview Presbyterian in Francisco, IN...near where my great aunt was buried last Friday 

Pics from my recent Indiana trip... 

My baby turns 5 today! Hard to believe, but she's got me wrapped right around her little finger! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SWEET GIRL!!! You are SO big and I'm SO proud of you! 

Indiana Wants Me...Can I Go Back There?

Having an emotional day--my last day in the town of my birth--as I prepare to leave for home in the morning. I haven't been back to Princeton in awhile and things have changed. At my great aunt's funeral this week, I found out that one of her two surviving siblings has a controlling share of my great grandfather's farm. His plans are to demolish the age-old farmhouse and reconstruct a new one on the site. Many of my relatives and I wish that he'd just restore Grandpa Dunning's homeplace, so that we can continue to reminisce every October at the Dunning reunion held on that property.

Besides my uncle's plans to alter this family icon and place of so many childhood memories for me, the entire area is undergoing change. Many farms have sold their mineral rights to a strip mining company who is raping the land for it's rich coal. For those not familiar with this type of mining, it pretty much destroys the landscape. So instead of green fields of corn and beans as far as the eye can see, there are mounds of dirt, clay and coal within a mile of my family's farm.

Adding to my melancholy, many of the town's old homes and buildings have been let go or simply demolished due to lack of funds or interest in historic preservation. In fact, the McConnell home downtown where I first learned to tie my shoelaces is no longer there. That took me by surprise during an early morning walk on Friday. The town square looks ratty...hardly the proper backdrop to a classic courthouse that is one of the few historic places being adequately maintained.

I wish I had unlimited funds to purchase the family farm from my great uncle and do something to help boost the local economy, preserve more of the town's rich history and relocate back in the place my grandparents all called home (and several generations before that on mom's side).

Call it nostalgia or whatever, but I've got this pull back to my roots that I can't explain. If only I could afford to move back here....more on this topic once I get the pictures that I took today developed (didn't bring my digital camera with me like I shoulda)...

Fathers' Day Tribute to Bowden

In honor of Fathers’ Day which just ended about an hour ago, I wanted to take a moment to reflect on my favorite pastime, watching FSU Football. This is an appropriate reflection for post-Fathers’ Day since the coaching staff of my favorite college team boasts a famous father-son tandem. All I have to say is Bowden, and every football fan in the country knows the family name. If only the word nepotism carried the same recognition value by the elder Bowden. If you know anyone in the FSU Athletics Office, you might want to pass along this definition and the proper phonetic pronunciation of the word (ne-PO-tism):

Favoritism shown or patronage granted to relatives, as in business.

You see, Bobby’s son Jeff serves as a receivers coach and co-offensive coordinator (co- because he couldn’t do the job himself). He’s languished for years in the role of play-caller and overall architect of the Seminole offense. The underlying fear among the Seminole faithful is that Bobby will put a vote of confidence in his son as successor if the wily ol’ veteran ever retires. Dadgum if that don’t beat all!

As an FSU alum and 18 year supporter of everything garnet and gold, I am downright scared about the next season with the junior Bowden in the coaches’ box, headset on ready! I’ve been following the “Fire Jeff Bowden” bandwagon as it fills and refills each season (or after each loss). I’m concerned that its movement seems to stall about December 1st every year, after the disappointment of yet another sub-par season fades away.

I want to keep the momentum going lest FSU officials feel that things in the Seminole Nation have calmed and that the tribe is one. We cannot rest easy knowing that another season looms just over the horizon. The excitement of Seminole Saturday Nights (and the occasional Thursday) is about to light up the west side of Tallahassee. Thousands of warpaint-clad fanatics will clamor for seats inside the Bowden castle so they can go hoarse doing the fearful warchant. And yet, we’ll still have to suffer through countless 3rd and long situations and drive-killing, mind-numbing reverses. Again, we’ll watch the Bowden braintrust abandon the run quicker than Weatherford can say “hike!” And, again, we’ll hear senior Bowden make the same, weary excuses for junior.

If you care one iota about FSU football, you’ll help me man the bandwagon that will hopefully steer Jeffy to a faraway place where football is merely an extracurricular exercise. Don’t let the pressure up. Visit my friends at www.hirejeffbowden.com and show your true Seminole pride!

Oh, and Happy Belated Fathers’ Day to dads everywhere!!!

Defending the Bridegroom?

I've considered myself a Christian since childhood, but only got serious about the cause of Christ at age 18. During my adulthood, I've witnessed many well-meaning, and not so well, but misguided attempts by those who believe they've cornered the market on truth and discernment to correct the rest of us. These self-appointed defenders of the faith--of absolute Truth--have made it their life's mission to point out the fallacy, the error, the downright blasphemy and heresy of those who don't hold to the same absolutes, propositions or interpretations of Scripture as them.

Lately, I've had a run in with a number of these hypocritical and hypercritical people. Since stepping out into this mysterious conversation often termed the E.C. (for emerging church or emergent conversation), I've been called everything from a weak-minded twit to a dangerous heretic. And not that insults hurled at me by anonymous online do-gooders really do much lasting damage, but I get tired of having the same debates over and over again.

Most recently, a forum that I participate in was singled out by a rogue, rightwing unit of the Calvary Chapel denomination, called Apostasy Alert. The leader claims that me and my online cohorts were trying to take the modern church back to the Dark Ages and Romanize evangelical Christianity all over again. The message thread was about one woman's nostalgic use of the rosary, a family heirloom, to aid her in contemplative prayer. The discussion was blown way out of proportion by the leader of Apostasy Alert and taken out of context to support her anti-Catholic rhetoric.

But I don't mean to single out one organization. There are thousands just like it in every denomination of Christianity. Want proof? Just Google the phrases "false teacher" or "false prophet" and you'll get over 20 million and 9.7 million hits respectively. Yes, I said million.

I understand that these people/organizations stake their tents to the Pauline warnings against false teachings (see 2 Cor. or 1 Tim.), but honestly who appointed them as God's watchdogs? When does Paul's letter to a first century church or a young disciple override the commands of the Christ to "love your enemies?" In Matthew 7 and Luke 6, Jesus tells the hypocritical defenders of the Torah to take care of the speck in their own eye. And wouldn't alleged heretics and apostates fall under the category of "enemies" to Christianity? So when do we turn the other cheek? Only if admitted pagans and heathens speak against us?

My problem with these defenders of Truth goes even further. Since when does God need any human to jump to His defense? Isn't Jesus the Bridegroom? Why on earth would a bridegroom need to rely on his bride to defend his honor, let alone the Bridegroom who is Christ???

If these self-appointed watchdogs, loaded to bear with Scriptures and ready to cut-and-paste at a moment's notice, were to put a tithe of their time and energy into actually helping a widow, a prisoner or an orphaned child, wouldn't they be exponentially more fulfilled? They might actually find the Jesus they're so worried about defending. We need more love and grace in the world, not millions of self-rightious do-gooders hellbent on making sure everyone understands how wrong, lost or hellbound they are!

Making Java History

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee and just as hard to sleep after.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh, 'Gift From the Sea'
Credit: www.quotationspage.com

Okay, I didn't want to blog about this until I had gone java-free for one week...and here I am! I haven't suffered headaches or dt's or excessive irritability (above my normal level) since kicking the coffee habit last Thursday.

In fact, as I sit here and type, I'm enjoying my first cup of decaf since going java-free, cold turkey. Now, this wasn't a well thought out decision. It was more spur of the moment. But last Wednesday, after drinking the strongest coffee i've ever made, I sat at work trembling from the caffeine and sugar rush (yes I drink it black with a heapin' helpin' of sugar). That day, I said to myself, "Self...this isn't good. I need to kick the caffeine habit." The next day...cold turkey. I was a little worried because I've gotten headaches before on days where I skipped the Columbian morning boost.

Well, thankfully, no headaches and we're a week into this new life. I'm not saying I've kicked the habit forever. This is not some religious ritual that I'll keep faithfully. But I feel that the limited caffeine intake (we already drink decaf tea) will be a good thing for my health. So if you've never had the courage to bypass the Starbucks, to go half decaf or to kick the habit altogether, take heart! There is life on the other side!

Thanks for stopping by.

A Ragamuffin Reality

There is a man in town who likes to darken the sidewalk near the busiest intersections and shout at passers-by with Bible in hand and signage that suggests they are bound for eternal torture. Recently, I passed him on my way home from work, but this time there were numerous others sharing the same street corner and joining him in his tirade against heathenistic, hell-bound Tallahasseans.

You know, I can't help but think of all the good that he and his ilk are doing for the kingdom of God. I mean, if "you're all going to hell" isn't the Good News...then I don't know what is! I guess that is why the following quote leapt off the page at me when I read it in chapter six of Brennan Manning's The Ragamuffin Gospel:

The ministry of evangelization is an extraordinary opportunity of showing gratitude to Jesus by passing on His gospel of grace to others. However, the "conversion by concussion" method, with one sledgehammer blow of the Bible after another, betrays a basic disrespect for the dignity of the other and is utterly alien to the gospel imperative to bear witness. To evangelize a person is to say to him or her, You, too, are loved by God in the Lord Jesus. And not only to say it but to really think it and relate it to the man or woman so they can sense it. This is what it means to announce the Good News. But that becomes possible only by offering the person your friendship--a friendship that is real, unselfish, without condescension, full of confidence, and profound esteem (p.124, softcover).

My guess is that the passers-by could care less about the man's/group's theology or eschatology and are more than a little perturbed at the message. I'm also guessing that if they were to fold up tent and move on that little difference would result. I'm further guessing that if they were to take all that hellfire-and-brimstone gusto and turn it into social action--like feeding the homeless at the local shelter or volunteering at the food bank or (fill-in the blank here)--that they might actually find Jesus themselves!

And what if they were to truly practice the age-old saying, "make a friend, be a friend, bring a friend to Christ?" Would they not be more in line with the gospel message of Jesus that even "ragamuffins" have a place at the table??

In my CD Changer...

...i have an assortment of music today including the following cd's:

"torniquet" kicks serious booty!











plus a couple of homemade compilations of 80's music!

God at the Gulf

Four and one half years ago, I had a close encounter with God in the dunes on Panama City Beach. I awoke early one morning while on vacation, wrapped my 4-month-old daughter in a wool blanket, and set out for a pre-dawn walk on the beach. I retreated up into the dunes in a deserted state park with my peacefully sleeping bundle of joy. We sat quietly in the cool, white sand as the sun began to emit its first rays of light over the horizon. I was so overwhelmed in that moment by the miracle I held in my hands and by the beauty I beheld with my eyes that my heart filled with joy and praise. I knew that I was closer to God in that pre-dawn hour than at any moment before or since. I was so thankful for the gift of life.

Fast forward to Mother's Day Weekend 2006...

I'm up again pre-dawn. This time, I'm vacationing in Miramar Beach at Destin, one of the most beautiful beaches in all of Florida. The full moon hangs like an incandescent peach over the waters of the Gulf. The first light of morning has just crested the horizon. My feet are nearly buried in the cool, white sand, as I scan this breathtaking panorama. Clouds are silhouted in hues of purple against the orange glow in the east while the sinking moon shrouds itself with thin grey clouds in the west. I can barely make out the shadows of two porpoises as they arch their way along a sandbar about 150 yards from the shoreline. Right in front of me, two sandpipers are playing "catch me if you can" with the incoming tide. It was a dreamy moment, to say the least. I knew that I was again close to God.

I think I will live at the beach one day...and I'll kick the coffee habit for good. Waking up to picturesque mornings like these make the need for cafeine seem obsolete. These encounters with God also make any and all church experiences I've had pale in comparison. I think that I'd like to live close to God on the Gulf of Mexico one day.

Themes of God in Scripture

A recent thread on the Ooze got some of us debating the "Word of God" and what that means. Here's what I posted several days ago:

i think we should talk more in terms of the "themes" of god, instead of putting actual words in his mouth...i mean does anyone know what language he speaks? what literal words did he say to put the stars, the sun and moon in place? "let there be light"? was that in king james english?

i mean, honestly, "word of god" is really just a metaphor anyway, isn't it? if someone were to record the literal word of god today, with our technology, could we then download it as an mp3? would it hold up in the court of christianity?

i'd rather see a discussion about the "themes of god" and where we see them woven throughout scripture, human nature, the intrinsic beauty of the world around us, etc.

was the "word" actually spoken audibly to the prophets or did they receive some divine impression in their spirit or mind? and how does the word actually become flesh? either it's in verbal or printed form...i mean if it is a literal word, right?

but if word is just a metaphor for divine themes, then we can see how those themes were lived out by jesus...how they provided an impetus for everything he did or said...and how they can motivate us to righteous action

because when jesus actually spoke "divine words" he often put them in parable form, but we seem to want to take every literal word printed in the bible as a literal story about a historic event...if jesus is the "word made flesh" and he dealt in metaphors and parables, then what's to say that's not how god has been speaking all along?

and if we do strictly deal in themes, taking literal accounts of the flood, per se, and taking them as parables with a theme, then have we really changed anything? wasn't gods intent to get us to think about the things in our heart? not to see if we'd build an ark every time it rains, or an altar every time we see a rainbow

so, what are some of your favorite themes?


btw, if you're interested in weighing in on the discussion over at the ooze, click here

High School Reunions

I've been working diligently on save the date postcards for my 20-year high school reunion. Here's the artwork that my wife and I came up with for the front of the card. The back just has the dates and contact information on one side and mailing info on the other. I'm pretty proud of what we came up with. We're thinking about turning this into a mock movie poster for the reunion, but using this version for letterhead for future mailings, etc.

It's funny that I even volunteered to help plan this one...more out of pure disgust over the 15-year reunion than anything. Not "ha ha" funny, but peculiar, only because my high school experience wasn't all that great. However, I broke down and went back five years ago and had a blast! Despite the reunion itself--in the basement cafeteria of our old high school in August with no A/C--I had a great time catching up with some old friends...and a few classmates that only now do I count as such.

I have to give many thanks to my Indy counterparts who are doing the lion's share of the work, as I am currently living 900 miles away. To Amy, Mike, Suzie, Joe and Annie...my sincerest thanks! This is going to be one helluva reunion.

King's X, Baby!

Okay, tonight/this morning I had an out of body experience. For the first time, I got to experience King's X live in concert. This is one of my all-time favorite bands, made up of Ty Tabor (guitars), Doug Pinnick (lead vocals, bass) and Jerry Gaskill (drums). They played in a small bar in Tallahassee, providing a very intimate setting. There were probably only 50-60 people there...and I was literally 10 feet from Ty, stage right.

It was incredible!

They played a lot of their new music which I'm not yet familiar with...but what made my night was the song "A Box" (which serves as my sig line on the Ooze), followed by a classic "Visions" from their very first cd Out of the Silent Planet.

Just to put this in perspective for you...I've been following this band for over 18 years. A friend put said cassette in my hands in 1988 and it blew me away. I wore out the cassette player in my Fiero, especially on long trips to Atlanta. King's X was grunge/hardcore before those terms were even popular.

I only reconnected with their music on a deeper level recently, as I began my journey into postmodern/emergent Christianity...and their lyrics became so much more poignant! I thanked Doug Pinnick last night for impacting my faith...what a cool, once-in-a-lifetime moment!

It was a truly spiritual experience.

If you want to learn more about this underground success, now entering their 25th year together, check out their Official Website.

Okay, I'm going to bed with a really big smile on my face...thank you, God, for simple pleasures and once-in-a-lifetime encounters!

The Point Of It All--Part II

I purposely ended my last post before launching into one of my favorite subjects—Grace.

This topic has come up in some recent threads on The Ooze, so I’ve had a few opportunities to put words to my emerging beliefs about it.

What I’ve noticed is that when you talk to Christians, the responses you get to grace are as varied as the number of mainline denominations in America. I know that my understanding of the concept of grace has deepened and evolved over the last 16 years.

What I’m beginning to grasp is that grace really is a free gift from God, but it is a gift unopened and unused (I can hear diehard Calvinists cringing at the thought). In other words, God placed the hugest, best, most sufficient present under the cosmic Christmas tree, but it is up to us, the recipient, to unwrap it, to use it and to enjoy.

The point of it all is that grace is to be shared. Jesus said, “For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” In other words, the more we use it and share it, the more we enjoy it. God wants His grace multiplied in the earth. And we are the conduits of that grace.

If all we do is talk about grace as a concept, in theological terms, then we become a bunch of windbags. God has not called us to be the pied pipers, hoping our song and dance will lead others to the gift of grace. He’s called us to action. We are participants in this redemption narrative called the Good News. We are the conduits of God’s grace in the earth. That requires action, not just words, concepts or theologies…and certainly not some song and dance (a shout out to my charismatic friends).

I truly believe this is what the apostle James was getting at when he wrote, “faith without deeds is useless.” I’ve always struggled with that verse in James 2:20. I always wondered where the balance point was between grace and works, because I was taught that praying the sinners’ prayer and making an honest confession were all that God required.

Grace is as useless to humankind as the unopened present under the tree holding all that blessed potential. The only way grace can be enjoyed is to be used in some way. That is where good deeds enter the faith equation. We must actively put grace into practice daily, so that its potential to change the world is unleashed. After all, who wants to play with an unopened gift? That’s all this concept of grace really is unless we use it, share it. And that’s the point, isn’t it?

Jesus said that we should feed His sheep, clothe the naked, feed the hungry, visit those in prison and so forth. Food to a starving person is Good News. It’s like the manna raining down from heaven. A friend to someone who is incarcerated and possibly shunned by their own family is Good News. Grace in action can take many forms, large or small.

God’s purpose is not just to fill some cosmic void called Heaven. He’s not a spurned lover looking to mere mortals for companionship. He wants His creation restored, healthy and whole. He’s poured out grace sufficient for the task at hand. What are we doing with it? Are we active participants in sharing the Good News? Are we conduits of His grace?

The Point of It All...

“What’s the point of it all?,” you may have asked once or twice before. I’ve been asking that a lot lately…not because I feel hopeless and desperate for answers, but because I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching and rethinking my faith.

In my last post about being destination minded, I touched on what I think is a root issue with too many professing Christians. They say they have this “great commission,” but if you ask them what that is, they’ll probably say something along the lines of “winning souls, making converts or leading others to Christ.” I’m not saying that this is misguided or wrong, but I often question the motivation and techniques. It’s not the “what” so much as the “why” that bothers me.

It has been my experience that most Christians are concerned with how many folks they’ve led to Christ…meaning led to an altar somewhere (not necessarily in church), but definitely resulting in something resembling “the sinner’s prayer” (as if there is a script). They are concerned about getting these folks “cleaned up and in church,” because that’s the natural progression of things.

The central motivation seems to be that we need to “save” as many people from hellfire as possible. We feel that the only good fruit is the number of converts we’ve “won.” We envision The Father keeping a scorecard just like our Sunday school teachers used to do on the chalk/poster/felt board.

Likewise, we support church plans and programs that promote our evangelistic agenda. We imagine that if we combine our efforts with some slick church marketing we’ll double and triple our production of converts. After awhile, it becomes increasingly apparent that we’re just small cogs in the assembly line to mass produce baby Christians. And that’s what Jesus was about, right? Winning souls by the millions? Increasing the size of His kingdom through mass marketing?

Uh…no.

The real point of all this is to expand His kingdom one person at a time, which may or may not include you “walking them down the Roman Road” or “leading them through the sinners’ prayer.” God is totally capable of bringing in all the lost and wayward souls He wants or needs in His kingdom, but I don’t think He’s trying to reach some occupancy limit in heaven.

I believe He’s building His kingdom right here on the earth. His purpose is to reconcile, repair and restore. He’s using Jesus-centered people of every race and walk of life to accomplish that. He’s given us grace…and it is sufficient enough for every person with whom we come into contact.

Stay tuned for more on the subject of this grace…

Destination Mindedness

I have always wrestled with my propensity to look beyond where I am to where I’m going. The destination has always been foremost in my mind and it has caused me to miss several “points of interest” along the way. I have made a conscious effort ever since adopting my girls to try and embrace the present, to savor the moment, to stop and smell the flowers.

Case in point, we were at the neighborhood playground on Sunday, just the three of us (my girls and I). I had a headache and was ready to get home. My oldest daughter (4 ½) insisted on going to the swings at the other end of the playground. Begrudgingly, I took my youngest daughter down there, too, and began pushing them both…my 2-year-old in the baby swing and her sister in the “big girl” swing adjacent to her. When the younger of them began giggling, I was jolted out of my “let’s hurry this up and go home” thought pattern. I immediately recognized this moment for what it was…precious…priceless.

As I continued to push my daughters, alternately, one hand on the eldest’s backside, then one hand on the baby swing, I cherished the moment and forgot about the destination. I soaked in the warm afternoon sunshine, enjoyed my baby’s giggle and relished the time with my daughters that seems to be passing so quickly already.

I’ve thought about this for the last 20 hours or so…and have come to recognize my destination-mindedness. It has always been this way…on long trips with my wife, on weekend excursions with my daughters, in my relationship with God.

God didn’t just put me here on this planet to always be thinking of heaven, my final destination. He didn’t send His Son to this planet in a big hurry to get “home,” either. If I am to pattern my life after that of the Good Shepherd, then I need to be less about the destination and more about the day-to-day journey…helping people when and where I can.

Thank you, God, for making me less destination minded. Help me to enjoy life’s journey, every little part.

Places of Worship

One of my favorite places to worship is at Camp Suwannee in Dowling Park, Florida. This beautiful campground is situated on the Suwannee River in North Florida and is adorned with huge cypress, oak, pine and plenty of Spanish moss. But what makes this place so special is a retreat weekend that is held there twice a year, called North Florida Tres Dias.

I made a Tres Dias weekend in October 1989 and have served on several weekends since…all of them at Camp Suwannee. The campground has several buildings, including a large gymnasium with windows across the back wall that allow a majestic view of the river’s meandering black water. At that end of the gym sits our makeshift chapel.

Imagine evening chapels at sunset, moss-draped live oaks silhouetted against an orange and purple sky, vibrant colors bouncing off the ripples in the river bend. It’s more beautiful than any painting.

In this surreal setting, 150 men gather to offer scripted and unscripted prayers, to meditate, to sing hymns and spiritual songs and to simply spend time with God. Miles away from the hustle and bustle of daily life, we’re offered this special place in which to worship our Creator.

Not only does the beautiful, natural setting inspire worship, but the almost tangible presence of God does so even more. We can thank the prayers of many saints for that. During a Tres Dias weekend, people of faith from all over the world are lifting up prayers on our behalf. Many men and women from our own community, mostly North Florida and South Georgia, plus others from far away lands, like Brisbane (Australia) and Florence (Italy) and points in-between. I believe that the massive amounts of prayer coupled with the spirit of service among the men present are what truly usher in God’s presence on the weekend.

Sadly, very few “houses of worship” I’ve attended had this same atmosphere. It just goes to show that you can “have church” anywhere that you have a gathering of faith-filled people, but the natural ambience, the prayers of the saints and the right attitude also help a lot.

To find out if there is a Tres Dias community in your area, visit www.tresdias.org.

House Mouse

I'm sorry, but as soon as I saw the star of Fox's new melodramatic med-drama I knew that I wouldn't be watching. For years, I've known Hugh Laurie as the bow-tied father of a furry little CG-animated rodent. I see right through his modern day scruffiness and tussled coif. He's still Mr. Little to me!

My HUMMER H3

Yep, that's me, the bearded one, standing in front of my newly leased White H3. Can I tell you that I love this SUV? So do my wife and daughters. With just 400 miles on it, the H3 is barely broken in. I took advantage of my employee status and got a tremendous deal on a 24-month, 15k mi/year lease. Thank you GMAC!

Now, if anyone else wants to own a HUMMER--or a Buick, Cadillac, GMC or Pontiac for that matter--you know who to contact.

Thank God for the beautiful, sunny 80-degree weather we're having. I'll have my windows down and sunroof wide open this weekend!

Welcome To the Show

This morning as I lay in bed, I began thinking about how differently my faith expresses itself these days. Whereas I once thought that faith had to be expressed with great fanfare and exuberance, I know see that for what it was…a show.

Let me explain.

I bought into the Pentecostal tradition that said you couldn’t “have church” without tongues, loud singing and other demonstrative acts of faith. Some churches in that tradition took it a step too far and encouraged crazy activities like snake handling. For the record, I never attended a church that had snakes or encouraged this insane behavior. But the churches I attended DID place a heavy emphasis on the demonstration, whether it was speaking and/or singing in tongues, shouting, dancing or wailing. The point was, you couldn’t truly expect to get God’s attention without a showy presentation.

In modern charismatic churches, and even some mainline ones, this show takes on the form of a pop music concert. You have polished musicians, some of them hired for a fee, performing radio-worthy tunes on a stage before a large audience. This is meant to get the people worked up emotionally, so that they’ll walk away with a sense that they experienced something spiritual.

Now, I don’t mean to imply that it is all superficial and emotional. Some of these people, myself among them, were genuine in their show of emotion. I thought that it was the proper way to express my love for God. I mean, what else was I created for if it wasn’t to put on a show for God? Didn’t Jesus warn that the rocks would cry out if I kept silent?

This morning, I actually began considering the practicality of that kind of “worship.” If God were to reveal Himself as say…my wife, would I constantly serenade her and make a big emotional show of my love for her? I mean, she is the person I’m supposed to love most in the world, but I don’t make a big show of it.

My point is, love has to be demonstrated…just not in the flashy ways we often think make the most impact. Haven’t you heard it said, “Sometimes the little things make the biggest difference?” Didn’t Jesus say, “I was thirsty and you gave me drink?” That’s a little thing, isn’t it?

I can demonstrate my love for my wife by cleaning the bathroom. That simple act of service tells her that I care about the things she cares about. Likewise, I can do the same for God. If I take my favorite wool blanket to a homeless man out in the cold, then I’m showing God that I care about the people He cares about. And Jesus even took that a step further. He said that by helping someone in need, I am actually helping Him! Isn’t that a much truer, more practical, more God-centered form of worship?

Subculture Memorobilia

When I was deeply entrenched in the Christian Subculture (aka the Christian Ghetto), I used to wear "The Lord's Gym" T-shirt, drive around with a fish symbol on the tail end of my car and eat lots of Chick-Fil-A. Okay, confession, I ate at Chick-Fil-A just two hours ago. Regardless, I counted these indicators of my deep and undying faith as treasures, virtual witnessing tools, if you will.

That was sometime ago.

Today, on my way back to work from Chick-Fil-A, I saw a bumper sticker that resembled the above JPEG. It made me want to pull the driver over to ask them if they really work in a woodshop for a guy named Bluestein...or to ask if their current employer knew they were working for a carpenter on the side?

I also thought about another one of my favorite bumper sticker declarations of faith:
God is my pilot.
How do those drivers think that makes their passengers feel? As a sharer of the roadways with these people, it unnerves me a bit. What about you?

Do you buy into the bumper sticker theology of these people?

Do you have a Lord's Gym T in your closet????

NACHO LIBRE!

http://www.nacholibre.com/

Click the link above. It's the new Jack Black movie from the producers of Napoleon Dynamite due out this summer. It looks "stupider" than all get out--IDIOT!--but I'll probably go see it at the dollar cinema.

RETROSPECTIVE

This week, I found out that one of my newest co-workers attended school with my wife through grade and middle school. They were childhood friends. This led me to peruse my wife’s old yearbooks for incriminating photos with which I could tease my co-worker.

I guess perusing those old photos put me in a retrospective frame of mind.

This morning, I was thinking back to a job I lost 4 years ago. It was an important job with the state emergency management agency. I liked the job and was well-suited for it. The only problem was my immediate supervisor. To many of my colleagues it seemed that this person was just biding his time until retirement when he could collect his state pension and spend his time on personal pursuits, like saltwater fishing. Well, I thumbed my nose at his authority once too often, thinking I was in good graces with the division director and bureau chief above him. That didn’t work out the way I had hoped, and in September of 2001, I found myself looking for another job.

I didn’t miss a beat, employment-wise, as I landed another job in the same field with a different state agency. I did miss a beat in the emotional arena, however. My feelings were hurt and I underachieved at the next job. Heck, I checked out and was again let go just three months later…the week before Thanksgiving.

I was so embarrassed about my situation that I didn’t even tell my wife until AFTER the holiday weekend. During my brief unemployment, I had a few weeks to re-evaluate my priorities. That was a God thing, no doubt about it.

This morning, as I sat in traffic pondering the what-if’s, I realized that losing both state jobs in that three month time span was a blessing in disguise. Had I stayed on that career path, I could have made a name for myself in the field of emergency management. I would have been a high-profile state official during the record-setting hurricane seasons of 2004 and 2005. I may have earned promotions and accolades, but at what cost to me and my family…my priorities.

Three jobs later and I’m in a place where I am very happy and my needs are met. I’m on pace to make more money than I would have made with the state even if I had stayed. I have not spent my life on the road or dealing with reporters and angry, displaced citizens. I do not get pages and phone calls in the middle of the night or on holidays, nor do I have to leave my family for weeks at a time to sweat in places like the Everglades.

Funny how much clearer I can see in retrospect God’s hand guiding me along life’s path.

Elucidation #2—Perceiving God

The second idea that I’ve been deconstructing over the last year is my concept of who God is. Who is I AM? Could He possibly be contained in an ark made of wood with gold overlayment? What about in my finite, human mind?

Thomas Merton asserts, “Our idea of God tells us more about ourselves than about Him.” I think that is true. We presume that God is more in OUR likeness than we are created in His.

I grew up with this perception that God is both angry with us, yet madly in love with us. This split-personality Deity is mostly angry in the Old Testament, acting out His wrath on those whom He chooses. He is mostly loving in the New Testament, offering up His own Son as a sacrifice for us.

As I’ve grown older, and hopefully wiser, I’ve discovered more of God’s loving-kindness in the Hebrew Scriptures, but I still wrestle with the stories of His wrath…say on Sodom and Gemorrah or on less guilty subjects, like Uzzah who, with the best intentions, touched the ark.

One thing that becomes more and more apparent to me is that the Scriptures were written by human beings, with limited understanding, faulty perceptions and irrational superstitions. Regardless of the amount of divine inspiration—which I do believe was the impetus for the recording of Scripture—there was that imperfect filter called the human imagination that surely played a part in the telling of the grand story.

It goes back to Merton’s assertion that our idea of God is rooted in our own personality, perception and imagination. It’s impossible to separate our ideas from our identity. It’s just as impossible for us to think beyond our limited comprehension. So anything we think we know about God is severely limited by our humanness.

God created us with these limitations. He knew that we could never perceive of His vastness. Yet, we often act like we have Him figured out. How arrogant.

It would be like trying to contain the entire Milky Way in the candy bar by the same name. There’s just no possible way to fit the greatness of God into our human-sized containers. So why do we box Him in by our finite understanding? Why do we even try?

I am discovering that God is so much more than He has appeared to be in my mind’s eye. He is not bound by the black and white text on the pages of Scripture, nor by the black and white thinking of my youth.

He is not some Great Mystery to be solved or a Hidden Treasure to be discovered, but the treasures of His love I continue to discover every year. It is that continuous discovery that makes this journey so worthwhile. My goal is no longer to figure everything out or to hem God in by my vain imaginations. I am just happy to be on this journey of discovery.
In letting go of my black and white presumptions about God, I have found much freedom. I am free to accept more of Him, and to accept others who are created in His image even if they don’t look or act like it to me.

If you are holding onto your perception of God as absolute reality, I ask you to consider the possibility of a much larger, greater, more powerful God than you can even fathom. That is the One True God, the I AM. Don’t settle for a facsimile, no matter how reasonable.

Elucidation #1--The Sacrifice

Well, it’s a new year and time to reflect on the year that just ended. I don’t want this to be a cheesy year in review, so I’ll spare you the top ten list. Allow me a few days to ruminate on all that I’ve discovered in my year of church detox and elucidate for you here.

First, I want to talk about the single most central event to Christianity, the sacrificial death of Jesus. As I was thinking on this, I thought of the oft-quoted line of Paul, part one of the “Roman Road” if you will. “For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.”

Central to my belief system is the fact that Jesus was God in the flesh. As the perfectly divine, yet totally human Savior, He was the perfect sacrifice for the sins of the world and the only acceptable offering to God, the Father. And since ALL have sinned…and fallen WAY short…we’re covered by this once-for-all offering.

While that may be a given for most, if not all, Christians, the church’s focus on the first part of Paul’s proclamation seems to belittle the second, which is “fallen short of the glory of God” (emphasis mine).

What does that mean, “the glory of God?”

Could it mean that we, as God’s cherished creation, haven’t lived up to our potential? Have we fallen short in areas in which we are totally capable of achieving our best? Living graciously? Being generous, kind, loving, accepting of others, etc.?

I was trying to explain the Passion story to my 4-year-old over Christmas. We celebrated the special day with communion as a family. Of course that raised all kinds of questions about why Jesus had to die. Instead of giving the pat answers I had grown up with, I tried to explain it to her in less gruesome terms with less emphasis on the “sins of the world,” which she wouldn’t understand, anyway.

The most basic way I could explain it is that it takes bread and wine (i.e. food and drink) for us to survive. Jesus told us that the bread is his body and the wine is his blood. That means we need Jesus to survive.

The more I thought about my simplistic explanation, the more profound it seemed. I came full circle back to a discovery I made months ago:

A life given sacrificially is a life gained eternally.

Jesus’ death is more than just some cosmic retribution for the sins of all humans. It is the gateway to life and to reaching the glory of God. It represents the way we humans must survive on things that are sacrificed, like the wheat that produces bread and the grape that produces wine. It also symbolizes how we must live selflessly in service to others.

Could it be that the glory of God meant to shine through us burns much brighter when we actually live this way?

Then why do we get so hung up on the sin issue, instead of letting God’s glory shine through?

Random Whining

(Disclaimer: Pay no attention to my last two posts on grace and humility…you’ll find little in this one.)

Okay, I know it’s the week before Christmas, but my Grinchiness is stirring! Here are my random gripes:

Gawkers & Squawkers
Gawkers (aka Rubberneckers) were already a constant danger on our roadways, now we also must deal with Squawkers…or those who insist on talking on their cell phones while they drive. Do they not realize that driving 60 mph on a crowded Interstate highway causes traffic jams of Biblical proportions???

Bumper Sticker Rage
I’m not one for cluttering my vehicle with stickers, but here’s one I’d like to make into a banner that unfurls from the rear spoiler of my SUV:

GET OFF THE CELL PHONE AND DRIVE!!!

This would be directed at all Squawkers (see above rant).

Unintelligent Design
I saw a news story this morning on television about the fight in the Dover (PA) schools about Intelligent Design. A local proponent actually used the word “persecution” to describe what Christians in that town are suffering because of a recent court ruling. Now if that isn’t indicative of the problem with American Christianity, then I don’t know what is. A federal judge's ruling against the teaching of what amounts to religious theology in public schools is persecution? Who’s getting stoned or crucified in Dover, PA?

There, I feel better now.

God is Love, Grace & Humility

I mentioned in my last post about the new book I just started, If God is Love by Phillip Gulley and James Mulholland (see jpeg in righthand column). Incredibly, I'm already halfway through it and it is saying everything I've been thinking for the last 11 months! In a nutshell...

We don't know everything...

God does...

Salvation is a journey/lifestyle/process...

God is love...grace...and humility all rolled up in One...

We are to be loving...gracious...and humble, the way Jesus modeled Life for us...

I haven't yet read Brian McLaren's A Generous Orthodoxy, but I'd bet it lines up in lock-step formation with the book I'm now reading. Interestingly, the authors of If God Is Love are Quakers. I say interestingly, because so much of the influence in other books and discusions in which I've been involved over this time of church detoxification have been Quaker, like Parker Palmer's Let Your Life Speak and many of my friends on the Ooze (link to it in the righthand column, as well).

I don't quite understand the significance of that--if any--as I don't know that much about Quaker beliefs/orthodoxy. What I do know is that I'm moving more to the left of my traditionalist, evangelical upbringing toward this theology of universal salvation. But I reiterate how limited is my understanding, so I'm not clinging to any one theology. I'm considering multiple points of view. At this time, all I can say is that I'm leaning that way. I still wrestle with the Scriptures that seem to paint an "us" versus "them"/"in" versus "out"/"blessed" versus "cursed" reality.

I'll post some very poignant quotes from the book next time. For now, let me give it a high recommendation to anyone who's grown tired/bored/disgusted with American Christianity.

Finding Grace in an Ungracious World

Okay, I ripped that title from the subtitle of a new book I started last night, If God Is Love. Good so far, but more on that in a later post. For now, I'm chewing on graciousness and humility.

This morning, I was correcting my daughter who had taunted me with a malicious-sounding "HA HA HA" because she beat me to the truck. I attempted to explain to her what it meant to be a gracious winner...and a gracious person in general. She quickly reminded me that I often taunt her in this same manner when racing around the house...to her bedroom, the dinner table...

"GUILTY AS CHARGED YOUR HONOR!"

I humbly apologized to her, then explained that the way she feels when I do that to her is how she makes others feel when she gloats and taunts over others a "meaningless victory." I assured her that daddy was not being a gracious winner when I did that to her. I promised to do better and requested the same from her.

I thought about that all the way to work. The subtitle of the aforementioned book still fresh in my memory, I considered what true graciousness looks like. Soon thereafter, I was confronted with my own ungracious attitude toward others...

An aggressive driver almost caused two accidents within 5 carlinks of me approaching an Interstate on-ramp. His wreckless driving made me so angry because it belied the callous selfishness of the driver himself. It made me want to run him down, drag him out of his SUV and punch him in the head. I immediately thought of the story we know as "The Good Samaritan." What did my angry fantasy bely about me? Would I actually fit the description of one of the muggers in that age-old story of an ambushed traveller left to die along the roadside? Beating a man and leaving him bloodied beside a busy Interstate with at least one slashed tire, so he couldn't drive so wrecklessly on rain-soaked pavement? Yep, that would be me. Pretty gracious, huh?

The more I considered my angry thoughts...okay, it was nearly road rage...the more I could see my lack of humility glaring back at me in the rearview mirror. Seems to me that a gracious attitude comes more naturally when we think of ourselves in proper perspective...like when we take on the attitude of the Shepherd and clothe ourselves in humility.

Humility...a concept I can't seem to escape no matter how hard I try to execute a counter trap play (football term, sorry). Now, I am left to consider my lack of graciousness, and how it seems that I can't do anything about it without the H-word coming into play. So chew on that awhile.

From My Journal...

It's a sleepless night in early December. I'm up--fully awake--at 11:00 PM contemplating the humanness of Jesus the Messiah. Okay, writing 11:00 PM doesn't seem that late, but I've been averaging a 9:00 PM bedtime the last few weeks. Anyway, I recently delved into the life of Jesus by reading a Bruce Chilton book titled Rabbi Jesus. Before that, I had explored the Mosaic Law to find evidence of grace, generosity and kindness toward aliens/foreigners/Gentiles there. To my surprise, these concepts were abundantly evident throughout the Law, so it is no surprise at all that Jesus expounded on them. The Old Testament states time and again that God's unmerited favor toward Israel was cause for humility, not pride, and that His grace was the foundation for faith (see evidence of the latter in Hebrews 11). The Law taught that Israel was to accept and even care for foreigners and aliens. It also taught that generosity was part of God's plan to bless the nations through them.

Considering all this makes it easy to swallow Jesus teaching these same principles to first century Jews. Interestingly, though, Jesus did not always live up to these divinely-inpsired ideals. I keep thinking about his ungracious response to the Syro-Phoenecian woman in Mark 7:24 (also in Matthew 15)...the Living Bible even calls her "a despised Gentile," while other translations simply say Greek. Either way, where was the compassion and grace toward this woman in need who Jesus compares to a dog?

Tonight was the first time I ever considered this episode as a glimpse into Jesus' own humanness. Now, I realize that it is possible that the prejudice of the gospel writer may have influenced his account of this transaction, but I also acknowledge the possibility that Jesus may have been acting in accord with his upbringing in that environment. If Galilean Jews really did look down their noses at these "despised Gentiles" and think of them as worthless--rather lowly--dogs, then I can totally relate to Jesus' very human reaction. Chilton even emphasizes the fact that the woman's response, her persistence clothed in humility, evokes a compassionate change of heart in the human Messiah. He heals her daughter. His gifts were not held exclusively for the Jew, but were available for the "despised Gentile" even when Jesus' humanness tried to interfere.

This New Testament story encourages me to act more graciously and generously toward those who maybe don't deserve it, at least in man's eyes. May God override my arrogance, stubborness, prejudice and hard-headedness when I'm met with an opportunity to bless others.

Three Word Adventure for Thanksgiving

My Thanksgiving holiday was spent mostly on the road. My parents and siblings live in Central Indiana, so I loaded up the family truckster and travelled 800 miles with my wife and daughters to go see them. It was a long trip, as I travelled 14 hours straight through the night on Wednesday. Did I say LONG? After recouperating and feasting on fried turkey, my wife and I travelled an additional 120 miles, roundtrip, to go pick up a car she wanted real badly. That meant we'd be putting 800 miles on two cars for the trip home Saturday. That trip was long, too, but we broke it up with well-timed stops and a switch of vehicles at the Alabama border. After 13 hours on congested interstates and highways, we made it home about 1:00 Sunday morning. As my head hit the pillow atop my very spacious, very comfortable, king-sized bed, I uttered three words and fell to sleep.

I've now had a few days to recouperate and gather my thoughts...and all said, it was a very nice Thanksgiving holiday. Besides spending some rare time with my parents, siblings, neices and nephews, we received two welcome additions to the family: my nephew Peyton (born 11/26 at 2:33 PM), and a 1999 Volvo C70. Now, I'm not comparing babies and automobiles, but both of them were huge blessings...the baby for obvious reasons...and the car because we've been down to one vehicle for months and it's been a major hassle.

As I look back on all the blessings--both new and old--this holiday season, I'm left with the same three words I uttered as I began that belated night of peaceful rest on Sunday....THANK YOU, LORD!

Movies To Laugh By

After my last post--and watching Steve Martin's The Jerk over the weekend--I've decided to compile a list of the movies that make me LOL...so here they are...

1. Fletch
2. Caddyshack
3. National Lampoon's Vacation
4. The Princess Bride
5. Young Frankenstein
6. Planes, Tranes and Automobiles
7. Christmas Vacation
8. Napoleon Dynamite
9. The Jerk
10.Meet The Parents

Honorable Mention: Monty Python's Holy Grail, Airplane, Revenge of The Pink Panther, Father Of The Bride, Dirty, Rotten Scoundrels, Meet the Fockers

There are probably others that I've omitted, but this is my best recollection of favorite funny movies. Feel free to list some of yours by commenting below.

Like The Sweetest Movie Ever!

In looking at my blog, things have been way too serious lately. So I thought it was time to lighten the mood with a little Napoleon Dynamite. If you haven't seen the movie--and you appreciate oddball humor--then rent it this weekend. Then, enjoy reciting the lines with your friends for weeks to come.

If you have seen the movie--and you appreciate it's oddball humor--then you definitely need to check out the Utah State Fair TV commercials.

My wife and I were introduced to this movie earlier this year by some good friends. We hadn't laughed that hard in a long while. So there...I've done my best to lighten the mood of this blog...just in time for the weekend!

Separation of Church & Hate

I saw an interesting bumper sticker yesterday on the way to work. It read, "I am for the separation of Church & Hate."

Now, I'm not much on bumper sticker theology, but that statement gripped me. I wrestled with it overnight and here's what I've come up with...

At first, I applauded internally. I thought, rather smugly, of how true that is. The church SHOULD be called on the carpet for tolerating hate. They hide behind phrases like, "Hate the sin, but love the sinner," all the while casting stones at just about everyone, from abortionists to drugatics to homosexuals. I thought to myself, "I'll write a good blog about this when I get to work."

Then, the truth hit me. I AM THE CHURCH!!!

So I chewed on it a little while longer.

Today, I've been thinking about the residue of hate in my own life and how it has produced prejudice, bitterness, jealousy and the like. Heck, just yesterday I called my own wife a "jackass." That's right. I said it. I've been letting petty things about her bug me so bad that not only have I not loved her much, I haven't liked her much either. This is my wife, for pete's sake!

I've carried a piss-poor attitude around for more than a week. I've thought to myself things like, "He's such an idiot. I wish he'd just shut up!" or "She is so stupid. Why can't she listen?" These are things I've thought about other human beings, created in the image of God. Is that not sickening?

So when I think that the Church ought to divorce itself from hate, I'm left with a strong sense of guilt about my own thoughts and actions. Gee, thanks bumper sticker writer! Idiot...just kidding.

Shedding Death

Recently, I've been pondering the Lazarus story and how his story is really our story. The way I see it, we've all been called out from death to life by the Good Shepherd. But what still tangles and trips us are the filthy linens of burial. Even though we've heard His call and come out of the tomb, we're still dragging death around with us. Jesus calls us to live.

What do your "death rags" look like?
Immorality?
Idolatry?
Jealousy?
Anger?
Selfishness?
Pride?

The Jewish zealot turned Jesus follower, Paul, spends an entire chapter of his letter to the "called out" in Galatia differentiating Spirit-life (i.e. real life) from the life of the flesh (i.e. death). Instead of selfishness and pride, he says that our life should be ripe with humility, patience and self-control.

These are the fruits of real living.

But notice at the end of the Lazarus story who has to strip him of his burial clothes? We cannot shed death on our own. Jesus can give us life, but unless we have help from others, we will not begin to live the Spirit-life. We need help to remove the bondage--the baggage, if you will--from the death that hung around us like a shroud. It covered our eyes and our ears. It bound our hands and feet. Death kept us from a life of service to others. As we shed death by dealing with our baggage with a little help from our friends, we can truly begin to live.

It takes humility to recognize this and ask for help. But real life--the Spirit-life Jesus promised--can come through no other means. That's why the ancient Jewish Scripture says, "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble."

Are We Churchians?

After recently explaining to a pastor friend what I’ve been up to, he asked, “So where are you anchored in?” In church-speak he was basically asking, “Who do you submit to? Who are you under?”

I thought the answer was obvious. Scripture even calls Jesus our “anchor beyond the veil,” so why is it so important that I be “anchored in” to anything other than Jesus? Am I a Christian or a Churchian?

This article, shared with me by a good friend, sums up my feelings about church:

http://www.theooze.com/articles/article.cfm?id=669&page=1

So I’m asking, “Are you a Churchian?”

Are you a student of the Shepherd?

The Good Shepherd taught his flock, his students (talmidim), that their one identifying mark would be their love one for another (see John 13:34-35). This distinguishing characteristic is noted several times in the ancient text. For example, take the account of Luke in Acts 11:26-30. The students of the Good Shepherd are first identified as Christianos, Greek for followers of Christos, the annointed One. After a great famine strikes the Roman Empire during Claudius' reign, these Christianos "decided to provide help for [their] brothers." Out of love, they shared what they had with those who had none, so that no one perished.

We also see this theme repeated in 1 John 3-4. Here is an excerpt from the Good News about the Shepherd:

This is the message you heard from the beginning:

We should love one another...We know that we

have passed from death to life, because we love

our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains

in death...If anyone has material possessions and

sees his brother in need but has no pity on him,

how can the love of God be in him?...Whoever

loves God must also love his brother.

The truth of these passages hit home with me as I watch endless suffering on the cable news networks. This month it is the victims of Katrina, without homes, power, food and water, and some without their loved ones. How do we show these poor victims the love of God? Do those of us who have plenty give willingly to those who are without? Can our lives be inconvenienced one iota for those whose entire lives have been disrupted?

I am grateful to see the outpouring of compassion and generosity from around the country. Many church groups and parachurch organizations are stepping up to the plate. But that doesn't remove the personal responsibility from each one of us. As students of the Good Shepherd, we are commanded to put our actions where our mouths are. John says it this way, "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth."

How will anyone know that you are a Christos follower, a student of the Good Shepherd? What are your distinguishing characteristics? Do your actions speak louder than your words?

Let's be true to our word and help our brothers in need.

Fair Wages

Fair Wages. Do your work well and get paid well. Do your work not-so-well; get paid not-so-well. We would typically call that a loss of wages, but in reality, the wages of not-so-well done work are lack, worry and stress. Wages are not lost. They are fairly distributed according to the quality of work done…in a perfect world, that is.

The Shepherd said “anyone who receives a righteous man because he is a righteous man will receive a righteous man’s reward. And if anyone gives even a cup of water to one of these little ones because he is my disciple [student], I tell you the truth, he will certainly not lose his reward”[1].

In the Greek, this word reward refers to wages. In other words, the person who does well by receiving a righteous man and giving water to those who are thirsty will be paid wages according to the quality of their work. They will be rewarded.

This principle is repeated often by the Shepherd…in word and in deed. He says, “follow me” and “learn from me,” then He goes about doing good to others. And in a final, humble act He gives His life so others might live. The basic principle is this:

A live given sacrificially, willingly, is a life gained eternally.

I came to this revelation over time, but finally journaled about it last night. This theme runs throughout the Good News about the Shepherd. His mantra was that you must give to receive. You must lose life to find it. He lived these principles as He taught them.

He wasn’t promising some future hope. He was bringing it to life in the present. He said that his students, who abandoned all, would “receive a hundred times as much in this present age”[2]. In other words, they would be paid for their work now, and paid well.

The Shepherd is a fair wage kind of guy. Follow His lead and you will be paid well now and in the future. As the Jewish Proverb says, “The wages of the righteous bring them life…”[3].


[1] Matthew 10:41-42
[2] Mark 10:30
[3] Proverbs 10:16

Mystery...Questions...Where's Velvis?

WHOA...33 days since my last post?!?! What is up with that??

Sorry to my half-dozen readers.

I just finished reading Rob Bell's Velvet Elvis. Sorry Zondervan, I refuse to include that cheesy subtitle you added to help market it in your bookstores. The book was very good. Hey, it got me blogging again, so that counts for something...right?

An interesting undercurrent runs through the book--the mystery of God. I say interesting since that same undercurrent has been running through my mind for months now. I've been asking myself, "What do you really know about God?" Most of the time, no one answers.

If you want to know some of my thoughts on the mystery of God, look back at my April post, Is mystery back in vogue? This post also found it's way into the Faith articles on The Ooze.

In Velvis (my short title for the book...again, minus the cheesy subtitle), Bell uses the better part of Movement One (12 of the 18 pages) to talk about questions and mystery. Here are my two favorite passages:

The Christian faith is mysterious to the core. It is about things and beings that ultimately can't be put into words. Language fails. And if we do definitively put God into words, we have at that very moment made God something God is not (p. 32).

Questions, no matter how shocking or blasphemous or arrogant or ignorant or raw, are rooted in humility. A humility that understands that I am not God. And there is more to know (p. 30).

Hmmm...mystery...questions...humility...I can relate to those things. Bell does attempt to put his faith into words, but he steps back from the Christian worldview and tries to take in the whole story from Genesis to now. He understands that WE are part of the story that is still being told...or as Brian McLaren would say, "The Story We Find Ourselves In" (another great book, by the way).

Where have you tried to box God in? Does your faith allow room for questions?

I'm glad a good friend lent me Bell's book to read. It got me blogging again. It also prompted me to pick up Chilton's Rabbi Jesus again and continue learning.

Thanks for stopping by...I'll try not to be a stranger on my own blog from now on. Good night.